"Aya" is a story with an element of truth, and a couple of elements of fiction. This is my second attempt to write, so please, criticize to encourage, not to make fun :)
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She was lying in bed, on her left side; facing the glow in the dark clock on the night table. This is her definition of being asleep, anticipating three o'clock in the morning, when her father is unquestionably asleep.
As soon as the clock hit three, she would get up and search for her Betty Boop fluffy slippers, climb down the stairs to the living room where the computer is, turn it on and go online.
Her Yahoo screenname was "cocoberries", she couldn't decide what she loved more, chocolate or strawberries. She would log on and wait, it could be a minute, and it could be a couple of hours. Her friend list is empty, except for that one nickname. The smiley next to it was dim, indicating that person being offline. She thought of making herself a cup of hot chocolate while she waits, she'd hear the 'knocking' when that person came online, the kitchen was just next door. While she was stirring in the coco powder, she heard the only sound that made her happy those days, the knock.
She carried the mug back to the living room and took a deep breath to start typing.
cocoberries: te echo de menos.
pisces203: Hey baby, I miss you too. How are you sweetheart?
Tears started obscuring her vision, the screen is now blurred and hazy. She couldn't hold it anymore, she had to cry and give way to her sorrow.
cocoberries: I miss you so much, it's been 3 years now since I last saw you.. And when dad found out I was calling you he's taken my cell phone, and grounded me.
pisces203: I know sweetheart, he's still angry with me. How's your little sister?
cocoberries: Alia's fine, she misses you too!
pisces203: How are you 2 doing in school?
cocoberries: She's doing ok, but I'm not.. this is my last year and I haven't studied a thing. How can I study when you're not around?
pisces203: On the contrary! You have to study! you have to graduate to come to university here and stay with me.
Pieces203 said that knowing it's impossible, but just to motivate her a little. Aya wiped away her tears and nodded to the screen, silently making a promise that she will study and graduate.
pieces203: you have to get some sleep, it's very late in Jeddah now. Go get some sleep and don't worry honey everything will be alright.
Pieces203: Te amo Aya!
cocoberries: I love you too mommy..
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Ahmed, Aya's father, met Maria back in 1980 in Barcelona. He was a businessman and it only made sense that he travelled quite alot. Maria was only 19 when he first met her. She was a saleswoman in Cartier, stunningly beautiful. She had long wavy jet black hair. Her eyes were crystal blue, thick lashed, and absolutely mesmerizing. She wasn't very tall, nor very thin. Her womanly curves blew his mind away. All he could think of when he saw her was having her.
He fell in love with her instantly, he lost his sense of reason and asked her out before he could say a word.
But that was him, he couldn't bear the thought of something beautiful not being his own. He wanted her to walk by his side so that people would envy him, not admire her!
Maria came from a poor family. Her father owned a farm; that's where he lived, and that's why he lived. Maria has always dreamt of the usual prince charming, that would sweep her off her feet, and take her away to a better place, better time..
Maria did not go to college, she graduated from high school and looked for a job. She looked for the job, where she could meet her prince. What better place to meet him than a jewelery store?
She was picky though; she was picky until she met Ahmed.
To be continued...
7 Comments:
This looks like it'll be very interesting. So far so good..keep it up =D
you've got my attention now I want to know more!
and p.s. I'm Very picky about the righters whos books i read!
so keep it up. and more more!
oh and since Faith didn't call it
"shot gun" :p
Well that is actually very good :)
looks interesting and promising
you're not trying to copy me and start writing stories now by any chance r u?! :P
i think you need to work on the conversation though..
i'm not a professional critic and u could see i'm not big on conversations in my own stories coz i still didn't master them
waiting for the rest of "Aya" ;)
impressive... I liked the twist in the start where we think she is talking about her bf...
heeeeeey.. ;)
way to go sis! i know this is ur frst attempt of writing a story, but remember how good u were at school in writing poems?
and abt the pic. mashallah u reall know how to drow!!! drow meeeee...
Sweet :)
Way To Go G!
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